![]() ![]() If you’re anxiously forcing something into your body, you’re just going to clench up more. Your breath and mind are crucial parts of successful booty play. Don’t jump the gun - you have plenty of time to get to the main event. You or your partner should begin by slowly massaging the outer ring of the sphincter and surrounding areas until you feel the anus relax. If you’re the receiving partner, calm your mind, steady your breathing, and try to identify and let go of any tension you’re holding inside of your body. While we can clench and unclench our outer sphincter consciously (try it right now), the inner sphincter cannot relax unless you are super duper chilled-out inside. Identify tension you're feeling in your body and let it go. Note: Keep in mind that you shouldn't use silicone lube with silicone toys since it can degrade the material. For a great starter toy, check out Fun Factory's Bootie Plug (in the small size) or Tantus' ProTouch. Starting with small toys will help you become familiar with how your rectum feels as things go in and out of it so that you’re prepared for a larger thing, like a strap-on dildo or penis. This means that you shouldn't dream of having anal sex without a thick water- or silicone-based lube. Not only is the rectum a canal that does not self-lubricate as the vaginal canal and mouth do, the entry is also "gated" by two - yes, two - sphincters. If you’re going to be the giver of anal penetration, don’t fuck an anus like any other orifice. Your rectum is not a vaginal canal, nor is it a mouth and throat, so don't expect your anus to work like other orifices. Anal play should be pain-free, so take it slow and pile on the lube (or spit). Switching from anal to vaginal sex without replacing the condom or thoroughly washing the penis or dildo can lead to a vaginal or urinary tract infection. If you're fluid-bonded with your partner - meaning you've chosen to stop using barrier methods, a choice that should be based on the results of comprehensive STI testing - it's still important to avoid transferring bacteria from the rectum to other parts of the body, for example the vagina. ![]() If you're not using condoms, utilize other methods to reduce the risk of transferring bacteria. (Of course, even if you are using a condom, many common STIs, including syphilis and herpes, can still be transmitted by skin-to-skin contact.) 2. You should also utilize dental dams during anal rimming, and nitrile gloves during manual penetration. To minimize risk, you can use a latex condom (like this one from Sustain) or polyisoprene condom (which is free of allergens, like the Skyn condom from Lyfestyles) during anal sex with a penis or dildo, unless you can completely sterilize the dildo. ![]()
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